Not Your Ordinary Housewife: How the man I loved led me into a world I had never imagined by Stern Nikki

Author:Stern, Nikki [Stern, Nikki]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: book, BIO026000
ISBN: 9781743431511
Published: 2012-11-30T14:00:00+00:00

There was some press coverage of our bust: being sex-related, it was juicy. We’d heard that Graham Kennedy’s News Show featured it and even the ABC’s nightly news program PM ran a segment on it.

I called Dory and told her of our plight. Being an avid ABC listener, she’d heard PM and, although our names weren’t mentioned, she’d suspected instantly it was us.

‘I knew it was you as soon as I heard the phrase “Warrandyte couple”,’ she said, pronouncing the ‘w’ as a ‘v’. ‘What a thing to be involved with. Nikki-le, Nikki-le, how could you?’

‘Listen,’ I pleaded, ‘we could really do with some support right now.’

‘How could you do this to me?’

Dory agreed with me that Shoshanna should be our greatest concern. I told her we didn’t even know who she was staying with, and we couldn’t contact her to reassure her we still loved her and that everything would be okay.

Dory was smug as she told me that obviously they thought Shoshanna was at risk. She also said she didn’t want anything to do with it. ‘What would Egon say?’ she added, reminding me that, in all their 70-plus years, they’d never broken the law. ‘I’m so ashamed of you.’

‘Well, believe it or not, I’m ashamed too.’ I had never been more ashamed of anything in my entire life.

‘I told you Paul was bad for you,’ she said, convinced that this whole ‘porn business’ was his idea. I insisted she couldn’t blame it all on Paul. Yes, of course it was his idea, but I’d gone along with it. I couldn’t abrogate my responsibility—I’d been a willing, if reluctant, participant.

‘Well, I blame him,’ said Dory.

‘Please, I need you to come to the Children’s Court so we can try and get Shoshanna back.’ I begged her to offer to have Shoshanna live with her while we sorted ourselves out. The sad fact was that we had no other family.

‘I can’t take her—I’m too old,’ she snapped.

I didn’t understand: she professed to love Shoshanna, and she knew how much her granddaughter loved her. ‘Perhaps you could hire a nanny part-time? Please . . .’

‘No—I can’t afford it.’

‘Then just come to court so they can see we’re not total trash,’ I entreated. ‘If we don’t come up with some alternative, the police will put Shoshanna in a foster home. Please! It would look good to have you there, and we need moral support.’

But she refused. ‘It’s bad for my health.’

‘I’m begging you—please, go . . . for Shoshanna’s sake.’

‘No, I won’t be there.’

And she wasn’t. Nothing had prepared me for Dory’s reaction. I thought she would give her usual ‘I told you so’ lecture, but that ultimately she would stand by me. I was really struggling to understand why she refused to show even a modicum of support for us.

Paul naturally capitalised on Dory’s failings. ‘I knew she hated you. I always thought she was a bitch. Now do you believe me?’

I said I was reserving judgement. Although I was very hurt, I honestly hadn’t thought she’d behave like this.

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